Film Four & Film Four +1: 12-11-11

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FilmFour TV listings guide Today.

11:00Please Sir![SUB]
A put-upon form teacher at an inner-city secondary school struggles to cope with his disruptive pupils and tempts fate by taking them on a fortnight's trip to an outdoor pursuits centre. Big-screen version of the TV comedy, starring John Alderton, Deryck Guyler, Noel Howlett, Joan Sanderson and Richard DaviesFilm/Comedy

13:00Secondhand Lions[SUB]
A youngster is packed off to stay with his eccentric bachelor uncles, who live in a ramshackle house with no mod cons in the middle of Texas. Worst of all, his mother has told him to find a stash of millions rumoured to be hidden somewhere on their property - but his wariness of the oldtimers disappears when they share exciting tales of tomfoolery from their youth. Family drama, with Michael Caine, Robert Duvall, Haley Joel Osment and Kyra SedgwickFilm/General Movie/Drama

15:10The Poseidon Adventure[SUB HD]
A luxury cruise liner capsizes on New Year's Eve after it is hit by a vast wave. A heroic priest becomes convinced it is only a matter of hours before the vessel sinks, so leads a group of terrified survivors on a death-defying journey through the upside-down ship to reach the surface. Disaster movie, starring Gene Hackman, Ernest Borgnine, Shelley Winters, Leslie Nielsen and Roddy McDowallFilm/Adventure

17:25Bless This House[SUB AD]
Middle-aged father Sid Abbott's dream of building an illegal whisky still in the shed is continually frustrated by the antics of his son and daughter. However, he has a bigger problem in store when new neighbours move in next door and conflict instantly erupts. British comedy, based on the sitcom, starring Sid James, Diana Coupland and Sally GeesonFilm/Comedy

19:10The Golden Child[SUB HD]
A private eye is recruited by a group of Buddhist mystics and sent on a mission to rescue an abducted boy whose supernatural powers will enable him to bring about world peace. However, the kidnapper is actually a demon in human form, determined to ensure the youngster does not fulfil his destiny. Fantasy adventure, starring Eddie Murphy, Charles Dance and Charlotte LewisFilm/Fantasy

21:00Sex and the City[SUB AD HD]
Fashion-mad journalist Carrie Bradshaw prepares for her wedding, which is becoming an increasingly lavish affair. However, husband-to-be Big is having second thoughts, while her friends wrestle with personal crises of their own. Comedy, based on the TV series, starring Sarah Jessica Parker, Kim Cattrall, Kristin Davis and Cynthia NixonFilm/Comedy

23:45Isolation[SUB HD]
An Irish cattle farmer facing financial problems agrees to let a scientist carry out DNA experiments on one of his cows in exchange for money, but the sinister procedure takes a disastrous turn, unleashing a genetic nightmare that will put many lives in danger. Horror, starring John Lynch, Essie Davis, Sean Harris, Marcel Iures and Crispin LettsFilm/Horror

01:35Conquest of the Planet of the Apes[SUB HD]
In the near future, humanoid apes are used as slave labour by brutal humans. An intelligent chimpanzee, the son of two apes from a further distance in time, conceals his ability to speak and lives under the protection of a kindly circus master. But when he is exposed, he leads his fellow simians in a violent uprising. Sci-fi drama, presenting an origin story for the original movie, starring Roddy McDowall and Ricardo MontalbanFilm/Science Fiction